THE DEATH STAR COMETHAnother helpless planet property "acquired"

[Updated 1:15 CST, 8/9/07]

Ok, Bill Smith. Here's a little to-do list while The Daily's on hiatus and you're the only sober person covering Evanston development.

1. Enough with the crack.
2. Get out of bed with Mr. Vader and this other dude with the glasses.
3. When presented with an extremely obvious question, go ahead. Ask it.

I am, of course, referring to the ongoing gutting of downtown Evanston. What happened today? Developers of the proposed 49-story Death Star (pictured above) acquired the landmark Hahn building, which is south of the property they want to build on.

Wait, you think, because you have the neural activity of a conscious human being: Didn't they say they were only going to use that one plot? Why would they need to buy the other building?

Only you didn't think that, because you are retarded and your name is Bill Smith and, DAMN IT, you were drunk while reporting again!

And who better to bring sense to this fiasco than everyone's favorite whisky-sodden journalist, Bob Seidenberg of the Evanston Review. So why buy the second building? Big reveal, everyone, big reveal.

To prevent anyone else from proposing a development on the block!

Which brings up another really easy question: Wait, you think, didn't someone already propose another development for that part of the block? Yes! Wait, didn't they drop their bid after finding out the people are opposed to Death Stars? Yes!

What aren't you telling us, Mr. Vader and dude with the glasses?

The facts, just to prove my own neural activity:

Developers say they will not touch landmark Hahn building. [Evanston Site Plan and Appearance Review Committee, page 4]
Tower developer acquires Hahn building [EvanstonNow]
Developers neutralize second tower possibility [Evanston Review]