ANNALS OF RETARDATIONHere's a Nalgene. Use it! We'll give you ten cents.

Oy, the Tribune and its trend stories. And what has everyone's favorite newspaper dug up today?

Why, Northwestern University is giving its new freshmen free 21-ounce Nalgenes! And if they reuse them at dining halls, guess what? They get ten cents!

This is not a joke. Given our student body, it might even work. If you see small Asian children with indestructible purple bottles hanging off their oversize backpacks at Sargent next year, you now know why.

Oh, also, this is a trend story, so something else must be going on, right? Right. Apparently administrators are going to encourage people to corded phones in their dorm rooms instead of cordless ones. Remind me who uses dorm room land lines?

Whatever. Go environment!

Class of 2011 encouraged to adopt greener lifestyle [Chicago Tribune]