THE LOCALSThe Norshore booze-supplying-parents-crackdown continues

Ok, so the parents in Northfield Township who gave their kid and his friends alcohol were charged with misdemeanors today. But the parents in Glencoe who gave their kid and his friends alcohol were convicted of three charges and face a year in jail.

Yeah, so, if you're going to ply your kid and his friends with alcohol? Maintain a strict one-beer-bong-to-the-face/hour limit and, you know, make sure no one hits a tree and dies on her way home in your driveway. Easy!
[Glenview Announcements]

THE LOCALSIn Brief: Past the impasse: Bill Smith shows a second emotion

This is more than "news people are talking about." This is news people are angry about.

Apparently Linda LaFianza, whose name is really more lezbot than Republican, is robo-calling residents! Evanston's favorite curmudgeon, Bill Smith, owner and purveyor of EvanstonNow, is not happy. After a brief shpiel, though, he comes to his journalistic senses. He's really against robo-calling from all parties! Yay balance, Bill!

[EvanstonNow]

CHERUBIMIn brief: The Cherubs are on LiveJournal.

Against my better judgment, I bring you the news that a girl named Megan — sometimes it's megan, actually; apparently no one under 19 is aware that rules govern capitalization — is blogging from the j-cherub program. Another item to strike from the resume...

Without further ado, an excerpt:

Micayla, I forgot to tell you how grateful I am to you for looking out after Pushkin...she is such a baby :) Anyway, take good care of her, I know you will!

All my love, your sister,
Megan

Again: Jesus. And I'd be remiss if I didn't share this swell comment on her last post:

(Anonymous) wrote:
Jul. 22nd, 2007 11:33 pm (UTC)
Last Week
Megan,
You were our topic of conversation at dinner tonite. We just couldn't believe these last 4 weeks have flown by and you're in the final stretch. We hope you have enjoyed it and broadened your horizons in the world of journalism. We are so proud of you!!
Love you,
Mimi & Papa

[Northwestern Updates]

THE FRESHMEN"Got Beer?...I'll Rush!"? Seriously, what is up with these freshmen?

What is this "Beer"? Who is this Trevor Barton, self-appointed master of "Keg Duty"? Does this business about the incoming class being, like, way smarter than the rest of us not apply to the rules of capitalization? More importantly, is Mary Desler aware that 57 underage students are about to gate-crash her serene, alcohol-free campus?

So many questions, so few answers.

Make what you will of the group's wall:

1. "Oh also, people from evanston will have some connections to get alcohol... so everyone search for the natives, lol" —Keg Duty master Trevor Barton
2. "there's always the ghetto -- its pretty easy to get alcohol without an id there" —Brenna McLean (Ed.'s note: Seriously? McLean?)
   

Yes, the ghetto is a great place to buy alcohol, but really, what are these "connections to alcohol" the people of Evanston have? Is this like, prohibition? You know what? I know what to do. "Search for the natives, lol."

Jesus.

THE LOCALSDrunk teens? Yeah, not going anywhere.

This week in stunning revelations produced by courageous suburban reporting: Yes, the parents who let their teenage son throw a really rather boozy party in their basement were convicted of, like, several things. But, and this is quite a but!, teenage drinking will persist, students say.

First, a little perspective. The party, well attended by students of America's High School^®, resulted in two deaths. The parents, Jeffrey and Sara Hutsell, were from Deerfield; the article does not say where their son goes (went?) to high school.

And, our reporter? J.T. Morand. Well, initials aren't what they used to be. While usually relegated to the "Here comes Harry Potter" beat (sadly, a real headline), Morand has some experience tracing liquor-and-coke-laden stomachs back to the whereabouts of their intoxication. In fact, Morand reveals, the two cases are related!

Suzanne Savin, mother of Jessica Savin, the Glencoe teen who died when she fell through a skylight atop a building in Chicago in April, is praying for the Deerfield couple.

Jessica Savin was the former girlfriend of Jesse Trace, the twin brother of Ross Trace, 18, who died in the car crash that also killed Daniel Bell, 18, outside the Hutsell home the night of the party last October. They had been at the party and were returning to it. Three other teens in the car sustained injuries.

With all this alcohol-related death, you might think New Trier students would be reconsidering their weekend bacchanalia. Not really, Morand discovers when asking the young sun-worshippers at Gillson Beach in Wilmette:

"Kids don't care enough to stop," said Lynea Martin, 15.

"Kids will still do what it takes to get drinks," added Erin Guza, 16.

And Jesse Trace, who has now lost his twin brother and his ex-girlfriend to a combination of alcohol, a skylight and drunk drivers? Perhaps we will find out when the reporting takes place somewhere other than the lakeshore. [GlencoeNews]